8 XXX : freeuse

Don't worry man, I got some good advice. After reading this letter i want you to get all dressed, but not too dressed, she just wants some dick not a husband. Get out that cool casual shirt and jeans. Now that you're all spiffy and shit, bust out that expensive ass cologne. That shit will drive her insane. And not that Axe shit dude. Be a man. Alright now that you're looking fly and smell like a million bucks I want you to look in tge mirror and repeat after me: "I am a 13 year old who needs to stop trying to impress people on the internet with obviously fake shit" Alright, now that you did that, hop into bed and get some rest. You got an algebra final in the morning and you gonna need all the rest you can get kid.
How come people post dumb fictional captions to this subreddit all the time but if fiction is presented in a way like this everyone starts screeching about how it's fake? lol 99% of this sub is fiction I'm not sure OP ever intended it to be taken seriously.